hickonfire

Jesus

In my opinion, Jesus needs better PR. Not more PR, better PR. The yuck nuts out there speakin’ on his behalf are weird and creepy. You’d think the Lord would have a better staff seein’ how he’s the Lord and all. The only one out of this whole bunch that’s turned out to have any damn sense is Tammy Faye.

I simply cannot abide these crusading Bible thumpers that won’t shut up about God. Do they think that putting up that one extra billboard on the interstate is going to finally turn the tide in favor of the Lord? Of course they don’t. They know Christians rule the world and they like it that way ‘cause they want to control every facet of our miserable lives. They’re not Christians, they’re Roman gladiators out to conquer everyone that opposes them. They don’t really give a shit about God. This has more to do with their own ego and weak sense of self than it does God. I’d bet money that right now Jesus is pacing around heaven, chain smokin’ and bitchin’ about what’s being done on his behalf.

Let me ask you a question, exactly how many Jesus bumper stickers do you have to put on your car before you can get into heaven? Is one sticker and that lame ass metal fish enough? Do you think the number of stickers is different for different car models? I mean, if you drive a hybrid Honda Civic it seems like you wouldn’t need as many as some dick driving a Hummer, doesn’t it?

I’ve got lots more to say about this subject but I’ll have to write about it later. The Fed Ex guy just delivered my Marilyn Chambers box set and I’m gonna go play Whack-A-Mole.

posted by hickonfire @ 6:41 PM