Tuesday, August 09, 2005

FRIED

I just got back from a trip to the mountains. If I don’t get outside of New Circle Road every now and then I go flat fuckin’ crazy. I like to go back to the hills and valleys where I grew up. It helps me stay centered. It also provides me with bloggin’ material. One evenin’ I popped into KFC for a little buffet action. Now, I think I speak for all hicks when I say that I wish they’d do away with that rank ass chicken meat and just put the skins out there. Shit, that’s why we go to the Colonel. He’s the pimp daddy of the chicken skin world. I’d bet good money he checks in on his stores from the other side ‘cause he was a nut and he’s dead. To tell you the truth, as I sat there poundin’ down some thighs I’m pretty sure I heard him whispering in my ear, “suck my skin boy, ooh yeah, suck it.”

Now, in the midst of all us puffed up grazers was a young, scrawny couple. The guy looked like Dale Gribble. The girl’s back was to me so I couldn’t tell what she looked like. She had dark roots and that greenish blond hair you get from bleachin’ your hair then swimmin’ in chlorine treated pool water. I have a profound fondness for this look ‘cause there was a high school girl that worked at the basketball concession stand when I was little that sported this exact look. Damn, she was hot. I’m tellin’ you what, she provided warmth for a lonely little boy on many a cold winter night, if ya know what I’m sayin’. Anyway, after our emaciated KFC couple finished up their third or fourth after dinner smoke they got up to leave and I see that she is pregnant! Holy shit balls! She’s also wearin’ my new favorite t-shirt of all time. In those velvet, local t-shirt shop letters it read: “yeah, I’m smokin’ for two!” It’s gonna be a great winter!

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